I'll never judge you.

That's probably the only promise I can make as a doula -- I can't promise you that your birth will go the way you want it, I can't promise you that I can protect your birthing space against hospital policies and care providers who don't respect your wishes. But I can promise you that I will back you in any decision you make.

If you decide once you're in labor that your birth plan is out the window, know what? It's not my birth, it's YOURS, and my job is to support you in your decisions.

I've been running into a lot of real negativity about how "other" doulas don't to things the right way, i.e., not the way the doula speaking does things. I've encountered what I can only describe as scorn from other doulas when they learn that I did not use a doula for any of my births. It's been actually said to me that I can't be a doula effectively if I don't use one for my own births. Mind you -- no one ever ASKED me why I did not use a doula.

If anyone happens to be interested, it has a bit to do with my feeling judged by women in my past, and frankly the last thing I need when I am in labor is to feel judged... or even just worrying about feeling judged. I don't have a lot of need for touch, and I find I can cope with labor, and other challenges, best without a lot of input or distraction. When I'm surrounded by a lot of people in labor, I feel the need to either put on a happy face, crack jokes, or just play hostess in one way or another.

This is not to say that I don't see the value in physical, emotional, and informational support in labor. Of course I do!

But I also understand and respect that everyone has her own way. I tell clients that what gets them through labor is the right way to do it. If they want me to dress like Betsy Ross and dance a jig, I'll do it. Whatever. I'm not them and it's not my job to be them. It's my job to support their choices. And if someone doesn't want a doula, then my goodness I would never pass judgment on that!

There is nothing that has happened in the past few days that has spurred me to write this, it's just been festering for a while.

Two Babies in one week!

I helped one family welcome a little baby girl in the early hours of last Sunday morning, and another family welcome their little girl late last night!

I can't describe what an honor it is for me to be able to do the work of a doula!

ACOG's new VBAC Guidelines

ACOG apparently listened to the feedback from the NIH conference. These guidelines are FAR less restrictive, and a step in the right direction!

Ob-Gyns Issue Less Restrictive VBAC Guidelines

Highlights:

In making plans for delivery, physicians and patients should consider a woman's chance of a successful VBAC as well as the risk of complications from a trial of labor, all viewed in the context of her future reproductive plans

and

restrictive VBAC policies should not be used to force women to undergo a repeat cesarean delivery against their will if, for example, a woman in labor presents for care and declines a repeat cesarean delivery at a center that does not support TOLAC.

a good feeling

i have a client due 8/6 and i have a very good feeling about this couple. they are very prepared, and yet the mom-to-be is very nonplussed about the prospect of her upcoming labor. it's not that she is thinking it'll be no big deal... so maybe nonplussed is not correct. it's more that she recognizes she'll be experiencing something she's never experienced before, and there's no real sense in tying herself in knots about something she can neither anticipate accurately nor completely control once it happens.

a real type-a-go-with-the-flow kinda gal. reminds me of someone... oh yeah, me!!! so yes, i have a good feeling about this labor and birth, in no small part because i feel like this is a very well-matched birth team, with great communication, clear and high expectations, and (this always helps) a lot of laughs!

welcome to the world baby A!

Welcome to the world, beautiful baby A. So nice to meet you, so honored to do this work.

Hospital Cuts C-section Rate, Leading to Healthier Babies

Tallahassee Memorial Hospital has decreased the number of preterm births--and thus admissions to neonatal intensive care units and infants with health problems--by cutting elective induction and C-sections over the last three years.

Isn't it nice to read about hospitals drawing the line, once and for all!? Of course... the early delivery rate at this hospital is down from a shocking 44% to a still-above-the-scandalously-high-national-average 37%. Nonetheless, I believe that the drastic reduction in the primary cesarean rate, as well as their continued practice of limiting elective inductions, will keep those numbers in decline.

First Client Since the Baby!

so, a little bit from doula-land. i have my first client since I was about 20 weeks along with my nearly 10-month old! C. will be 11 months old by the time this client is due and hopefully it'll be a terrific, straightforward birth for this wonderful mama. Of course primarily for her own well being but also for me, my husband, and the kids! fingers crossed!